"The Parent Trap" But With Seniors

In our pilot episode of Living Through The Shift, your host Tiffany Harris introduces herself, shares a little bit about her journey as her mom's caregiver, and tells you a lot about what this podcast is all about.

Tune in to find community, comfort, and guidance as you are going through your own Caregiver journey.  You're NOT crazy, you're just going through some Shift!

Connect with us on Instagram!

Check out Our Website!

Transcript

[music]
All right, well welcome to the first episode of Living Through The Shift.
I'm your host and podcaster, Tiffany J. Harris, and I'm so happy that you're here.
I just want to tell you a little bit about myself.
I'm a comedian. I just started podcasting.
I have over 10 years of experience in social services, and I've been taking care of my mom
dementia for over five years.
And I'm really good at finding resources and helping people.
What I've realized throughout this process is I'm a young caregiver and there are about 25% of us out here
who are probably thinking we're crazy and you're not crazy.
You're just going through a lot of shift right now.
However, I just really want to help you through that process.
So today, what we're going to talk about or starting off,
we're going to talk about her, who went where, why? So who I am, what we're doing, why,
and just continuing to find a little bit of inspiration and just keep going.
It is a really hard time sometimes.
Also, the best thing that I've learned about being a caregiver is that you can only get about two steps ahead
of this thing. I'm a caregiver for my mom with dementia, so I just want to be a few steps ahead
just so I don't feel like I'm drowning.
And it's hard. It can be hard. And I know you're probably saying, why is she saying that? And it is.
And I think if we can all acknowledge that, but we can also say it can get easier and there are resources out here.
I think that'll make our lives a lot more smoother.
So who I am, I started off doing comedy back in 2019 and I had to take a break.
I've been in Nashville for over eight years and I'm a Chicago native.
And I moved my mom down here, a bell back in 2020 in the middle of the pandemic.
And she was in the early stages of Alzheimer's and I had no idea back in 2022, January 2022.
She was fine. She had just got diagnosed with Alzheimer's, but she was still in the early stages,
so she was able to live on her own.
About two, two weeks later, she ran away twice, tried to go back to Chicago,
and I had to move her into an assistant living facility and she lived there for about two and a half years.
Throughout that two and a half years, we lost access to her pension and as a result,
I'll become her conservator or guardian to take care of her.
I had to leave my job. I had to do a lot of things and I had to move through a lot of shifts.
And that's really the purpose of this is that I've learned a lot throughout the process,
but also I found really great support. I found a support group that I can go to.
I also realized that in the support group, there weren't really many people my age going through this
and I was one of the first people in my group to be going through this experience.
And through that, I lost friendships. I've also gained friends as well.
And I don't want people to make the same mistakes or missteps that I made throughout the process.
So this is kind of me being a really good friend, guiding through you throughout some of the mistakes that I've made,
but also some of the great wins that I've had throughout this journey.
And what we're going to be talking about today is some of those things and how I navigate at that.
I hope you continue to listen. We're going to have some really awesome guests coming on here.
I've met some really awesome people, especially in Nashville,
throughout the Alzheimer's and dementia community.
I've made some really great friends in the wellness space as well.
It's really hard to take care of yourself as a caregiver, but you can definitely do it and having community is great.
And that's my goal is to build a community with you all so that you're here
and you know that you're supported and that you're not.
Pretty me that it is a lot of stuff.
And I understand I'm not a parent. I don't have kids.
So it's ton of heart because we are doing a lot of these things that seem very similar to parenting.
But unfortunately, we don't get tax breaks and there's not many resources out here for us.
However, there are some and that's the great thing is that this is your networking community.
We're giving you the greatest resources. We're giving you the things that some of your friends probably wouldn't know
because they're not in those spaces.
And by coming here, you're coming to meet with people who know about the next best thing in these spaces.
The things that are coming out in the next few months so that you know,
oh, let me sign up for this or oh, maybe this is accepting for me as a dementia caregiver or even just a caregiver in general.
Also help take care of my dad sometimes my sister.
She takes care of my dad and I take care of my mom. I call it the parent trap, but with seniors.
My dad is legally blind, but it's okay.
He can still hit on women. So he's fine or okay.
But yeah, I do know a lot about that space as well and just helping people throughout this process.
So where I am right now in my stage of life is I'm 34.
I just turned 34 back in February. I'm in my fifth year of caregiving and my mom has moved in with me.
And that's been a huge transition. I've had to take off work or leave my job in some cases.
And I realize that sometimes people just aren't as accepting in regards to taking care of your parents.
That's why you're here so that you don't make the same mistakes that I did.
And even if you feel like, oh my gosh, this is so much.
The greatest thing is that the people who are coming here, they want to laugh with you about this stuff because dementia is hilarious.
I think it's very hilarious that my mom, she has dementia and she can also still remember to tell me that I need makeup or I need to get my hair done.
So we have to find humor in these really hard times.
So who do I think is listening to this podcast?
I really want to make sure that I reach as many people as possible.
Maybe you're in your late 20s or maybe you're in your 40s and you are navigating taking care of your parents.
You're trying to navigate career and children and relationships and finances.
And you're realizing that maybe your parents were the procrastinators and maybe you're not the big procrastinator.
Maybe you're realizing that life isn't what you really think it is.
And I really just want to make sure that people know that this can be a really interesting experience, but also it can meet so many awesome people along the way.
So maybe you're in your career and you're starting to have to take care of your parents and you're realizing that my job doesn't have family or haven't been here long enough or I'm trying to climb the corporate ladder or I'm trying to make more money or I'm trying to figure out my FYSA or you know my high yield savings, my high yield savings account or my flex savings account or my CDHP.
Maybe you're just trying to figure out how to take care of yourself and take care of your parents or maybe you're not even in that stage of taking care of your parents, but you're saying I can see the force for the trees or I can see the fact of the matter is,
conversions are appropriate for a fire to occur.
And maybe your parents are avoiding having that conversation and that is what this podcast is for.
It's you're going to have people who had parents who didn't want to talk about this stuff, so maybe then you give this episode to your parents and you say we have to talk about this stuff.
What I realized through this experience is that my mom was very afraid of certain thing and that procrastination was, yeah, she was fearful of things, but the procrastination caused a lot of pain for me.
And I don't want people to have to go through that, so maybe that's the stage that you're in or maybe you're in the stages of dating and you're realizing that you have to take care of your parents or not and you're trying to say how can I navigate this, how can it make time for a life because I've met a lot of people who said, you know, I gave up my life for 10 years and I came back out here and it was a completely different world.
Or maybe you're trying to navigate friendships because you are in the early stages of it, you're in the late stages of it and you're grieving and you're realizing that life is a lot more intricate than you thought what it really was.
So that's what this podcast is really for.
It's you're seeing your parents getting older here.
Sometimes it's not fun and maybe you're in the stages of anticipatory grief or maybe you are really grieving your parents and you're saying this is so not fun and I realized that when I was talking to my therapist, I said, this is so not fun and that's going to start the podcast and you know, we call it making space, making space for grief really.
And no, there is no way that we can agree perfectly, but sometimes we can put things in place so that we don't fall for it.
And that's really what this is. This is you setting up whatever you want so that you can be as safe as possible and that you can feel like, alright, I can do this.
But the reason why we have 911 and my mom was a 911 operator is because we've been indoctrinated and people have told us to call 911 when there's an emergency.
And there really isn't a hotline for caregivers, you know, you can call 988 but it's not really that type of situation.
You really just need support and there's so many different numbers, but someone doesn't know what number to call.
So that's really what risk podcast is about, which is, you know, you're building your network, you're building your team and you come and listen and you get certain bits and pieces from each episode so that you can start building a light.
And I'm building a life that you can live well as a caregiver and I met people have I met friends who they go to work out every single day or, you know, two times a week they go and teach a class because that's for them.
And I don't want someone to have to, you know, give up their life because life happens, you know, life does happen shift happens all the time.
And we say that a lot we're always like stuff happens and then it happens your friends are like that was a little bit too much stuff and the thing is you're probably wrong.
A group of friends who don't understand like stuff really happens, but we're here to say it happens all the time and there's things that you can put in place so that you can handle this so that you can easily navigate it and know sometimes it's it's not fun.
You know it's it's the setup it's it's the idea of I love going to IKEA and I love shopping and buying due dads and I also he put in together an IKEA case but once I put it together it's done and that's it.
And especially when I've done it correctly and that's really the point is that we're going to help you put together the things correctly and you know I think of it like a yoga class if you commenting or like that's not I'm not there yet that's okay because we know that aging progresses so maybe down the road you'll come back to an episode you'll say okay this is the
next episode and you just pick up what you need and you drop off what you don't and that's what we really say in yoga you know whatever you want to do whatever poses you want to take go ahead take it so if there's something that you feel like okay I'm not there yet I can't navigate it it doesn't feel safe that's okay you know just pick up what you can and then the rest will come back to you but I am definitely hopeful that you'll definitely get something really great out of this it's educational and it's going to be really fun entertainment for you as well.
So just sit back and relax it's going to be awesome so that's really it I know in my story I started taking care of my mom when I was 29 my sister and I are about six and a half months six and a half years apart and my sister back in I believe June of 2018 we went on this really amazing trip to my reach and I didn't realize that that would be the last trip that was
the last trip that we took together before both of our lives changed and my dad he was living in Chicago my grandmother had passed away about six months before and he had two falls recently he broke the left side and the right side of his body and this was the right side of his body because they both got a match and she had to go up to Chicago and after the trip we were so excited and then she gets a call that you have to drive to Chicago for
her to be because they realize that his insurance would no longer pay for him to stay at the rehab facility so as a result she had to go to Chicago move everything out of his house and move him down to move him down to Mississippi where she was living at the time with her husband and brother in law and I just remember getting back on a plane and just not really thinking about it because
I knew that my sister and I we had a very interesting conversation back in December of 2017 with my grandmother passed and I remember her saying I get you're dead and you're in mom and this was kind of like a parent trap conversation and I'm like I don't know I think I was like 26 at the time I had no idea what she was talking about and I just said yeah okay core whatever and I didn't know that it's
over your son or my life would be impacted to and I didn't really think about it you know I didn't say oh yeah like we should probably have a deeper conversation about this because I knew that my mom with age and I knew that she would get sick and I knew she would get help and I also thought that
everything would be great I would have an amazing marriage or relationship or maybe I would have kids and I would have a great apartment and you know really great job and that was none of those things I my credit was shot.
She was like a I don't know a two episode are going crazy and I don't know if she was going to come back or not regard my credit why I'm not a relationship that was falling apart I was at my body was really going through a lot of stuff and life happened when I was going through life and I realized that I had to just go ahead and take it.
My sister though she had to go and move my dad and with her husband and that was about about two years into their marriage they had just got married and it was actually about a year and a half into their marriage so they're still in the early phases of their honeymoon phase and they're really excited about living life and then they have to go and take this you know 60 like six foot two man into their house who's using a walker and who's legally blind and has a common is slowly losing his vision.
And he's not legally blind yet but he's going through a lot and you know it was just a really difficult situation for them for them and I didn't realize that and I would go and help her but then I had to start taking care of my mom about two years later and we had to kind of go through the same process and it kind of foreshadowing for me so my sister and I when COVID happened we drove up in March of 2020 and I remember getting married.
I remember getting to her house and house was in a disarray and everything was all over the place and I just remember thinking oh this isn't good and my sister looked at me and she said she's gonna have to move down there with you and I just thought oh my god no this is the worst thing that could ever happen to me like it's COVID and I'm from in this job and having gotten promoted and I've been here for like you know five years and I just I want to be promoted and I want things to happen for me but it was also COVID and I remember it's going to get a power of attorney and we're going to be in the same way.
We went to the bank and the banks we thought they were closed but it was just really weird it was just a very weird time and I just remember thinking my life is gonna change after this and it did it did and that was almost five years ago and from that I became a guardian for her so we were a conservator here in Tennessee and I have to file a conservatorship accounting every single year.
I was her power attorney but the notary signs of the witness so we messed up the paperwork so I had to become a guardian and I've had to navigate home ownership and deal with a lot of things that she just didn't want to talk about I remember years ago ask him I'm like hey let's talk about this stuff and she would always say you know stay out of my business and you know what I realize is okay well if you're not going to talk to me well then the court is going to talk to me and then I'm going to have to talk you know to someone who gets it and I think that's the thing is.
Procrastination can cause a lot of excess paperwork for this one so if you don't want to procrastinate go ahead and jump on this train with us but yeah we were just really like the parent trap with senior so.
I'm a mom and my sister has my dad and we take them on trips and and we figured out navigating that now at the stage of I don't really take on trips anymore because it's really difficult for her she gets confused and now I'm at the stage of navigating how do I go on and I'm not going to take it.
I'm navigating how do I go on a trip and go and live my life and try and be excited about it and also you know make things work.
It's a really interesting process but my sister and I we become a lot closer throughout this process and it's just sometimes life will make you take a break.
I know where I am right now I'm constantly feeling like why am I in this stage of extreme character development like I don't feel like I need that much I'm resilient enough like I don't need to do anything else.
I feel like I figured it out and I think that's the point is yeah I have figured out a lot of stuff but also there's probably some other things that I do need to figure out so.
And if you're dealing with siblings I've also dealt with you know siblings who don't want to show up and it's just me and my sister but sometimes it's hard because my mom and I we did not have a really great relationship through this I was not the person who is oh my god I love my mom so much I did love my mom also loved her from afar I used to say my mom and I love each other so much and we figured out boundaries so well that you know we have to keep two states between us to communicate.
And that really works for me and then it didn't that I said oh she's really all over my boundaries and you know it's kind of hard when you have parents who they didn't give you what you needed and they they weren't who you needed them to be or who they were supposed to be as a parent and you have to navigate.
You know you don't want to help take care of them but also you kind of have to give over your feelings because no one else can do it.
I remember becoming a guardian and starting the process of that and I didn't want to I really hated it and and everyone just said well you know no one else can do it and we call this agency and they're really busy and we call this other one and they're really busy so no one can take the case.
It's the only person who can do it is you and I just felt like God this is way too much I really don't want to do this but you know we figured it out and I'm gotten to the point where I'm okay with telling my attorney this is wrong this is wrong like someone messed up the paperwork it wasn't me you know so I've definitely got my communication skills up first sure but I don't want anybody have to go through extra paperwork or extra things it's just really interesting and and through that I've had to navigate you know my friendship.
My friendship and my sister and you know I understand that you know we did the relationship that I got that I wanted from my mom and neither did she and I have to respect the know I have to respect that sometimes she doesn't want to be there and I've also had my own journey where I've followed for giving while she's forgetting and I'm forgiving her and you know I talked to my cousin he's a pastor and he said you only forgive someone one time and I say yeah but it's like Tyler Perry so like something comes up and then I stuff like I just I just I'm not really happy.
I just I get man I stumped down like two feet and you know it's sometimes it's kind of hard you know but I realize that it can be really great my mom is the sweetest person now it is truly astonishing to me everyone's like your mom is so nice I was like yeah she completely God amoecia who she used to be and it's just really really interesting but everyone loves Jackie for me.
There in love with her she's really helped her create an amazing life herself and I'm trying to help continue to create a life for myself and see what that looks like and that's really what this is is that you know this is a phase of life that I am in and you know down the road things will definitely be different and that's what it is life continuously shifts and it's up to us to decide if we're going to keep going in.
I think there's been several times where I've given up and we're going to talk about some really dark times and we're going to talk about some really awesome times and I know the saying's you know you can't bring a horse to water but you can't make them drink it I've definitely been in that part before but also in caregiving and I think if you're going to leave you are or whatever.
I think you'll realize sometimes you can go to the water and you don't have to energy to even bend over and drink it because if you do you're probably going to drown and you need a friend to come over and say here's a couple water let's keep it going and that's what I've met throughout this time I've met really awesome people so yes I may have lost some friendships and people who didn't understand the season that I'm in and that the season that I wasn't at the time where things change for me and I'm also met some really awesome people who I've just met.
I've met some people who have just said no we completely get it and I would rather have you know five authentic friends than 15 you know not authentic ones and I feel like I finally understand the meaning of you know you only have as many as many friends as you have on your hands and you know I get it it's it's not fun and I'm taking on this title I think that's the purpose of this podcast is that I don't want anybody to feel like I'm a caregiver.
I'm a like I've been there I am there you know I'm a caregiver yeah you're a caregiver but also your daughter your mom your son your person your friend you're in a relationship you know you're a boss maybe your teacher maybe your regular teacher who teaches kids in school or maybe you're instructor or you'll get teacher you're many things you're multifaceted and in the season sometimes we take on that caregiver hat and we just wear it and we wear it until it runs out and then we don't know who we are and we look at you.
I know who we are and we look at ourselves in the mirror and say I have no idea who I am and I want you to come to this park and say well I think I know who I am I'm so many different things and and we're going to talk about that we're going to talk about who you were before because I know sometimes for me I don't even know what things were like before I used to complain about so many different things and now I'm saying oh my god.
No idea that was so crazy and also I can talk about my own procrastination and and that's what we're going to talk about I didn't go for things because I was so afraid of oh I don't want to you know what myself out there for this job or I'm afraid to go to a different job because this job doesn't care about what I have to say and sometimes we stay in a place too long and I think that's what we're going to talk about is this like
fight or freeze you know sometimes you're in this stage of caregiving where it seems like things are just constantly being thrown at you and it can be really difficult to navigate and sometimes for me I'll speak for myself a freeze and I can't move because I feel like I don't want to make the right the wrong decision but what if the right decision is the wrong one for now but still not choosing is still choosing so I just we can talk about those things and that's really the point is you know you make a life for your self.
Now and you figure out how your family and how your parents fit into that equation and once you start to decide oh this is a person that I want to be and it works for me and now I'm at the stage of life where I like my mom I do and also you know I want to be a part of certain things.
So I want to have you know my own life and we just got a new caregiver and you know she said okay you can start going back to work and you know what and I said oh my gosh and then she said oh you can go on a date and I was like a date what's that and I just and she said it so many times I just literally thought like I don't even know what a date is and hopefully as this podcast girls will start to have more community and we'll do events and I'm a comedian so you know I had to think about it I comedy before this that I was able to laugh about it.
But even then my family has shifted into you know talking about my parents are aging and that's really hard for the audience because they're kind of like oh this is kind of cringed like you're comfortable with it but we're not comfortable with it either and talking about that and saying you know what it's okay to talk about these things is really hilarious and you know but also now shifting back to saying well who was I before what type of comedian was I before this and I have friends saying you know I know this is the phase of life.
But maybe you should start thinking about the life that you're going to be in you know when you don't have to deal with this and this doesn't have to mean that my mom's not there but maybe someone comes in and they help me more with it and me being able to hand over you know can this person take care of care.
I've been her full-time caregiver for about almost a year now and and finally with this caregiver company coming in I've been saying oh they're going to do medication management can they do that and that's really a point is for us to do that.
The point is for us to be able to say someone can hand over the reins there's people out here who want to help you just haven't met them yet there's people who are out here who want to hear your stories just haven't spoken with them yet.
And no you're not crazy you're just going through a lot of shift and it's a lot of stuff and it's really heavy and there's also people who want to help you in private creative ways to help you with that.
I found an amazing respite program for my mom and I found that's a dollar a day I found really great caregiving for her program for her that is free and working like getting grants for her so that's really the point is to say yeah it kind of is frustrating to navigate it but also when you're in a community of people who get it it makes it so much easier and also this isn't to say get rid of your friends your regular friends because you need those you need your club friends.
You need your most of friends you need your brunch friends you're going to need different stages of people in your life and different types of people to be able to have fun with you but when you go to your brunch friend and you talk about caregiving they're kind of like great not only talk to you about brunch I do not talk about caregiving and diapers and disasters it's not my thing but they're there when you want to go and get French toast and have a most of light you know you want to talk to your girlfriend who is a social worker and she's your friend because she understand.
And she talks about caregiving but also you all can go to the movies and you can have fun and I think that's really the point of this is to say like yeah it's hard but also trying to make sure that we disclose information to people who really understand it and also knowing that there aren't some protections out there for us in regards to employment so there's things that I would suggest you do and that's where you're going to learn.
Throughout here you know how can you protect yourself as an employee while you're going through this who do you tell certain things who do you trust in this situation because at the end of the day unfortunately people a lot of people only care about productivity and here if you're a caregiver you are so productive you have mastered multitasking to a tee and you are probably very exhausted and we're going to help you figure that out and also have ADHD and I figured it out because I was a caregiver and I cannot handle all of this.
I said oh my gosh I'm drowning. I don't know what I'm doing and then I had a girlfriend who said oh this sounds like you in college you definitely need to go get checked for ADHD and it took me six months.
But I probably realize that said oh this is so unmanageable this is why I've realized a lot of different technique but this is definitely a safe space and we're going to have so many awesome people to share with you that I really just want to introduce you to these people so that you can figure out how to make your life a lot easier.
I'm constantly see people out here struggling every single day and I just think to myself I feel like a lot of people are out here and they see people struggling but maybe they don't know how to help maybe they don't have the energy to help and unfortunately now that I'm in this situation maybe I've been a little bit more cynical maybe I listen to the song friends how many of us have them and I don't have them many which is crazy but also I have a lot more great friends so maybe I don't have you know
20 people that I hang out with but maybe I have you know five good solid people that I hang out with and that's good enough you know or when people say I'm trying to think of the saying like nobody knows the trouble I see there's a lot of people who are out here who know the trouble you see it's just they don't have the energy to stop or they don't know how to stop and that's a really interesting part of this is that you're learning you're becoming more empathetic and I know back in like 2019 everyone's like I'm an empathetic.
I'm an empath but I met a lot of caregivers who were in paths who are absolutely amazing and you know you get it and and I don't want anybody to go through that but also it's it's different it's not you have to be happy all the time and and you have to be sad all the time you have to be one thing you can have like 77000 different emotions you can be happy, hurt, healing and you want to go to the club and you want to be crying in the club like Camila Cabello
like there's so many different things you can be honestly whoever you want to be in the journey whatever that's just why we're here we're just here to like have fun and talk about these things my mom a little bit about her.
She is pretty early in her stages of dementia in regards to she's pretty young she's 68 she got diagnosed when she was 63 and she's probably been going through this since she was about 53
53 when they told us that that was probably when she was dealing with it and we've also helped her live really well you know we've gotten her hooked up with some really awesome neurologist and your physiologist and you connect to her with the right group of people and also helped her build a really great structure for her as well and she's really happy
and that's really great for her but also it's been kind of a challenge as well she was an assist living facility now she's living at home now she thrives while she's living at home so there's a lot of things you know she used to work for the police department and now she doesn't and and that's also kind of hard for her you know she used to sew and
I was really looking forward to getting all her clothes and then in a frenzy of mania she threw all her clothes out you know so I had to process that and sometimes it was very emotional and sometimes it still is and that's really the purpose of it is that we're going to talk about this stuff and sometimes it's a handful and sometimes you know it's not but at the end of the day we all can do this we all can continue and you know I've been on the red it's and you know people say
oh I'm I'm so up to my head you know and then some people say wow like my journey is over and what happens and you know yeah we'll probably continue to talk about this you know for long because if anybody's ever gone through it it's something that kind of stays with you but some people keep it a secret and this isn't a secret
this isn't you know your finances are not a secret the things that you're struggling with are not a secret and that's really what I want people to know when you're listen to this park has been
listening to this park has I don't want anybody else to go through what I went through in the beginning it was relatively isolating when I noticed that throughout this time I realize as the years have progressed more people have come out and their young caregivers
and they're talking about their experiences and I've made friends who have figured out how to really navigate their journeys really well and it became less isolated I said oh there is a group of people who are out here who are talking about this.
And I think even through that I realize that I met their people who are in their 50s and 60s who they've gone through this that's just something that they don't talk about I think this is just a process that we kind of just don't really talk about aging or dementia or Alzheimer's or anything in that space and I met a lot of people
who said God I really need to share my story or I went through that for 13 years and I had absolutely no idea and the thing is your struggle should not necessarily be a secret but maybe we just have to share with people who are actually willing to hear our stories and who want to help you with those stories.
And that's why we're here because I get it. Life can be really crappy and if you go up to someone who probably has no idea what you're talking about they're probably going to look at you like you're crazy but you're not because they haven't experienced that.
I wouldn't go to you know a 12th grader or something and explain stuff about college calculus because they probably never had that experience before so they have no idea.
But in this case I probably would go to a 12th grader and say hey I haven't taken pre-calc before and they know exactly what I'm talking about so in that space.
I want you to know that there are people who are out here who are going through the exact same thing that you're going through and you can definitely get through this.
I definitely think of it like a resource manager so for me I've realized that I'm really resourceful and not in a cocky way like oh I know so much but I do know a lot of things and I think it's okay to say really good at this.
And I really have this really awesome gift and how can I share people how can I share my gift with people and I think that's the thing is so many of you out there thinking I don't know how to figure this out and you probably have hundreds of numbers in your phone
and you're probably thinking I can't reach out to these people and there might be probably like 10 people in the phone that you can reach out to who probably have access to resources that you have no idea about but the thing is that people are afraid to have these conversations
and that's the point of this space is that you're not afraid to talk about this stuff.
You don't feel weird. It's not drains that you're going through this. I know that it was hard for me to talk about it initially. I remember one time I had some really embarrassing moments.
My mom had several accidents in one day and I just cried and then two weeks later I was talking to a friend and she's like oh my god yeah girl they had an accident all over the bathroom.
It's completely fine and that's really what the space is so even if you're saying oh I'm not in you know the stage of life I don't understand or I am in the stage of life but it's really hard.
It's really for us to hear to just be here and find the humor in all of it and that's really what I want you all to get out of it is that we are a community and we're going to guide you through the beginnings of the community.
We're going to have some really interesting people in here and I've already talked to them so a few of the guests are people who are here to help you navigate your resources but also navigate your working in your resume and you know getting ready to move into the next stage of your life.
So that means finding a job that works for you but also we're going to have Cheryl Blanchard from Alzheimer's Tennessee. She's going to come on here and talk.
I'm also going to have one of my friends who's a mortician and I know that's not going to be fun but it's going to get a little dark but it's also going to be really honest because we're all talking about things that are honest and that's what this focus is about.
It's okay to be honest and it's okay to tell your story and be truthful and also try and find the humor in all of it.
It's not super fun and sometimes it is really super fun and sometimes it's sad and sometimes it's great we're going to talk about dating and how that is for dimension dating.
And that's really interesting or how do you navigate taking care of your parents and a relationship.
I think I noticed that when my sister got married she started taking my care of my dad about two years into her marriage and we realized that that was really hard for her and that really changed the dynamic of her marriage.
We're going to talk to some dating and marriage coaches and experts so that we all can realize that we don't have to give up our lives but we just have to be a little bit more strategic about those things.
And then also, you know, we're going to talk about where you are in life and the different staging.
So we're going to have some dementia experts come on here and talk about it.
And so this podcast is not going to be necessarily all about dementia or all about all those armors but it's just going to be about living through the different stages of your life right now.
I'm in the stage of taking care of my mom with dementia so I'm navigating comedy and trying to do all those things and the guilt of wanting to do those things.
So we're just going to have some really great people and a lot of these people I've met personally I've worked with their friends, their family and they're a part of my network and I really want to share my network with you because I really feel like you could truly benefit from this.
It's going to be a really fun ride at the end of the day.
You're not crazy.
You're not going to have to learn a shift.
So when it's for the ride, you have any questions you can email us at iatlivingthroughtheshift.com and also you can find us on socials at livingthroughtheshift.com.
You want to hear your stories and you want to hear your questions and over time, you know, we want to just make sure that this is something that you want to hear.
So we definitely want to hear feedback and yeah, I'm so happy that you're here.
So thanks for listening.
Thank you so much for tuning in to living through the shift podcast. I'm so happy that you took some time to hang out with us today.
While you're here, I want to give a special thanks to our sponsors, D&D Fitness.
You can find them at dndfitaparel.com.
I also want to give a special thanks to the rest of the hotel.
This podcast could not be bought to you without them.
They have been so amazing letting us record here at their podcast studio.
So if you don't know anything about the rest of the rest of the is Nashville's number one beauty hotel.
And they also have an amazing program called Rooms for Rooms which helps solve Nashville's homelessness problems.
So definitely check them out. They're doing some amazing things.
You can find them at www.musclenational.com
And we'll see you next week.